How to Drink Single Malt Scotch

New York Magazine has a decent article on how to drink single malt scotch along with some very pricey reviews of various brands.

I went through about a year when I was obsessed with single malt scotch before it almost broke the bank. Then I discovered that blended Famous Grouse was much cheaper, had the same effect and was just as enjoyable as its more expensive cousin.

Even though they're a little OCD, I agree with most of New York Magazine's tips on how to drink scotch. I disagree with number 4:

"(4) Add roughly the same amount of water as whisky. Sampling whisky neat is likely to hurt the nose and numb the tongue, rendering both senses less acute than they should be. Use bottled water. Tap is chlorinated, and its smell could affect what you taste."

First off, if scotch hurts your nose, you have no business drinking it, you pussy. And what the hell is he talking about, "the same amount of water as whisky"?! It's freaking single malt scotch---the king of all distilled spirits; the nectar of the alcoholic gods; Scotland's water of life. My friend, please, please do not add as much water as scotch unless it's a blended scotch. That advice is enough to make me never want to read New York Magazine again.